350K consider middle class here!

[Mety]

I guess we have to break it down like we are in second grade for IHO.

What?s a synonym for not that hard? A person might say easy

Vocab lesson for eyephone.

Saying something is "not that hard" does not mean that it's "easy". Nor does it mean it's not hard. It just means it's not "that" hard.

Also, saying something is "easier" doesn't necessarily mean it's easy either.

Is that harder, hard, easy or easier for you to understand?

I can't believe I did this, but here is what google says for that.
https://www.google.com/search?q=synonym+for+not+that+hard&oq=synonym+for+not+that+hard&aqs=chrome..69i57j0l5.480j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

I guess a word can be interpreted and taken so different than what the original writer intended. Maybe that's why IHO put *that* before hard.

Edit/Added - Another linkhttps://forum.wordreference.com/threads/not-that-hard！what-does-“that”-means？.2192177/

 

[irvinehomeowner]

I guess we have to break it down like we are in second grade for IHO.

What?s a synonym for not that hard? A person might say easy

Vocab lesson for eyephone.

Saying something is "not that hard" does not mean that it's "easy". Nor does it mean it's not hard. It just means it's not "that" hard.

Also, saying something is "easier" doesn't necessarily mean it's easy either.

Is that harder, hard, easy or easier for you to understand?

I can't believe I did this, but here is what google says for that.
https://www.google.com/search?q=synonym+for+not+that+hard&oq=synonym+for+not+that+hard&aqs=chrome..69i57j0l5.480j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

I guess a word can be interpreted and taken so different than what the original writer intended. Maybe that's why IHO put *that* before hard.

Edit/Added - Another linkhttps://forum.wordreference.com/threads/not-that-hard！what-does-“that”-means？.2192177/

Your 2nd link is what I was saying.

I even put asterisks around ?that? to emphasize it.

It?s ok, some people miss the nuances of written word.

 

[nosuchreality]

I never considered my job as that hard.  Having retired early and opting to Mr. Mom it, raising the kids isn't that hard either.  There are two very notable differences.


The first is simply rank and privilege, when you lead an org of a couple hundred people, you can materially change things and your peers generally accept your viewpoints if you haven't f-d up the relationship even though you may still need to take one for the team.  To say its not that way dealing with the schools, doctors is a bit understatement. Frankly, if you're younger, female and stay at home, there's plenty of bias. JIMHO, if you're not managment at work, as stay at home, you'll be treated like an incompetent peon until you crack the right whip a while.

The second is just the number mindless time sinks.  You either spend the OP $350K or you levergae your executive functioning skills to manage hurry up and waits. Then even with extensive policing of the kids, you repeat it tomorrow.

 

[irvinehomeowner]

@Mety:

BTW: I envy people who are able to keep one parent at home to take care of the kids. Just because personally I don?t think it?s ?that hard?, I know it?s not easy and it?s good for the kids to be with their parent.

But at what age do you think kids should be in a daycare/school setting where they develop some independence from their parents?

I ask because I know people who have home schooled their children all the way up to high school and I find that a bit too helicopterish.

 

[eyephone]

Sometimes people don?t work well with people
1. They don?t like to learn new things and don?t want more responsibilities. They see it as more work.
2. They constantly blame everybody except themselves  (coworkers and management)

Sounds familiar? (Now he is denying it after he made that post) lol

The first is simply rank and privilege, when you lead an org of a couple hundred people, you can materially change things and your peers generally accept your viewpoints if you haven't f-d up the relationship even though you may still need to take one for the team.  To say its not that way dealing with the schools, doctors is a bit understatement. Frankly, if you're younger, female and stay at home, there's plenty of bias. JIMHO, if you're not managment at work, as stay at home, you'll be treated like an incompetent peon until you crack the right whip a while.

 

[momopi]

There's a difference between "unable" and "unwilling".

It's not reasonable to expect an underage child to leave his/her abusive parents, because the child lacks ability to fend for himself/herself.

As an adult, if you work in a battery factory and the acid fumes is making you sick, it's your responsibility to quit and find another job.

A former coworker wanted his wife to be able to stay home with their children, so instead of buying a house in Irvine he opted to buy a cheaper town home in City of Orange.  He was willing and able to make the necessary choices to make it happen.

A former worker for mortgage company in Irvine during the bubble era was "peer pressured" by his boss and coworkers to purchase several cash flow negative investment properties, which he self-managed to reduce cost/overhead while feeling a deep sense of angst.  When other property investors say "it's not that hard", he lashes out at them.  Would a reasonable person allow his peers to pressure him into signing a million dollars worth of mortgage debt on rentals that don't make money?  Was he unable or unwilling to stand up to peer pressure?

 

[eyephone]

But I don?t think ?he? works at a battery factory. 
Also, I don?t think ?he? was pure pressure to buy investment properties by his peers at work.

I like your examples.

There's a difference between "unable" and "unwilling".

It's not reasonable to expect an underage child to leave his/her abusive parents, because the child lacks ability to fend for himself/herself.

As an adult, if you work in a battery factory and the acid fumes is making you sick, it's your responsibility to quit and find another job.

A former coworker wanted his wife to be able to stay home with their children, so instead of buying a house in Irvine he opted to buy a cheaper town home in City of Orange.  He was willing and able to make the necessary choices to make it happen.

A former worker for mortgage company in Irvine during the bubble era was "peer pressured" by his boss and coworkers to purchase several cash flow negative investment properties, which he self-managed to reduce cost/overhead while feeling a deep sense of angst.  When other property investors say "it's not that hard", he lashes out at them.  Would a reasonable person allow his peers to pressure him into signing a million dollars worth of mortgage debt on rentals that don't make money?  Was he unable or unwilling to stand up to peer pressure?

 

[irvinehomeowner]

Poor eyephone.

No one is supporting his hate accusations so now he thinks he can attack my work environment.

He has no idea and can?t prove a single statement. Keep jabbing, maybe you can get some other members to help you.

 

[eyephone]

Poor eyephone.

No one is supporting his hate accusations so now he thinks he can attack my work environment.

He has no idea and can?t prove a single statement. Keep jabbing, maybe you can get some other members to help you.

I'll probably take flak for this but staying home and taking care of the kids is not *that* hard. I'd much rather do that than deal with co-workers who don't do their work so it makes more work for you or management that doesn't understand what's happening and makes stupid decisions that affect your job. At least with your own kids, you are the one making all the calls and the "compensation" is more enjoyable and rewarding.

Now, how can I say this? I was a stay-at-home dad for a few years... but I was also working side contracts so I was doing both. Even my wife agrees that staying home to take care of the kids is much easier than working full time.

You said it not me.

 

[Mety]

@Mety:

BTW: I envy people who are able to keep one parent at home to take care of the kids. Just because personally I don?t think it?s ?that hard?, I know it?s not easy and it?s good for the kids to be with their parent.

But at what age do you think kids should be in a daycare/school setting where they develop some independence from their parents?

I ask because I know people who have home schooled their children all the way up to high school and I find that a bit too helicopterish.

It's definitely a blessing only I can work and my wife can stay home for kids. When we did our financial calculation before she quit, it was not supposed to work, but then we decided to see where it would take and it's been working so far for couple years. There's been bonus, incentives, some freelance gigs here and there by surprises. I do believe it was God who led us to have those opportunities since we took a leap of faith. Some people might say God has nothing to do with it, but I believe it was God who helps us not just in this matter but all things in our lives especially when we take faith over money. Of course it was not too far with just my regular income to be sufficient. I would not recommend someone to just do what we did because you have faith. Every case is different. We have our own house, but we don't own a 3CWG SFR so maybe that helped?

While it might not be that hard for you and your wife to raise babies/kids, I think it's hard for my wife because I see it as she's sacrificing her career and also it limits her availability in terms of everything. It limits her to hang out with her friends. It limits her even eat food since she has to feed the baby first (and clean up after, not just food but mess ). It just puts so much limit for her to be her. But she also sees it as a blessing she can do what she does. So it's hard but joyful if that makes sense.

I don't have any specific number or age to start daycare/school. It all depends how the kids respond. I'm not against sending kids to daycare. I actually think it helps for them to get along with others in early ages to develop on social skills and further a smoother transition to elementary school later on. But sending a 2-year old kid from 8am-6pm everyday while we make money elsewhere just doesn't seem right to us. I think having other friends come over to our place or visiting them regularly sort of helps. Trying part time daycare could also help. I understand full time is not that much more expensive so people just choose full time, but again, the money shouldn't come before our kids IMHO. I just think it's important that the kids receive full of love from moms (or even dads) whenever needed especially in early ages. I'm also against home schooling if it's like that all the way up to high school because I think it's important to be out there with others kids despite of some conflicts and whatnot, but again that's just my opinion. Every case is different.

 

[eyephone]

It?s all personal preference. It?s up to you to reference God into the conversation regarding your wife staying at home. But it?s your choice and your interpretation.

You could of send them to private school.

 

[Mety]

It?s all personal preference. It?s up to you to reference God into the conversation regarding your wife staying at home. But it?s your choice and your interpretation.

You could of send them to private school.

I don't see it as us bringing God into our decisions or lives. We can try, but that's not how it is. It is that God is the Sovereign One and we happen to be in His perfect reign.

Yes, it was "our preference and choice" for sure. But if it was a right choice or if it was a good choice, then I believe it was God who led us to choose that path thus He takes care of us also. We can't say it was "our own wisdom." If we've chosen a wrong decision, whatever that may be, then it is all on us. God might not have anything to do with that since it was all us. Easily put, you can't blame God for your own fault. Though God may work together through all our decisions, even the wrong ones, into His good outcomes eventually for us as written in Romans 8:28.

Although I lived all my life as a Christian, it took awhile (many many years) for me to believe this truth.

 

[eyephone]

It?s all personal preference. It?s up to you to reference God into the conversation regarding your wife staying at home. But it?s your choice and your interpretation.

You could of send them to private school.

I don't see it as us bringing God into our decisions or lives. We can try, but that's not how it is. It is that God is the Sovereign One and we happen to be in His perfect reign.

Yes, it was "our preference and choice" for sure. But if it was a right choice or if it was a good choice, then I believe it was God who led us to choose that path thus He takes care of us also. We can't say it was "our own wisdom." If we've chosen a wrong decision, whatever that may be, then it is all on us. God might not have anything to do with that since it was all us. Easily put, you can't blame God for your own fault. Though God may work together through all our decisions, even the wrong ones, into His good outcomes eventually for us as written in Romans 8:28.

Although I lived all my life as a Christian, it took awhile (many many years) for me to believe this truth.

Private school teaches creation. God created the earth.

 

[Mety]

It?s all personal preference. It?s up to you to reference God into the conversation regarding your wife staying at home. But it?s your choice and your interpretation.

You could of send them to private school.

I don't see it as us bringing God into our decisions or lives. We can try, but that's not how it is. It is that God is the Sovereign One and we happen to be in His perfect reign.

Yes, it was "our preference and choice" for sure. But if it was a right choice or if it was a good choice, then I believe it was God who led us to choose that path thus He takes care of us also. We can't say it was "our own wisdom." If we've chosen a wrong decision, whatever that may be, then it is all on us. God might not have anything to do with that since it was all us. Easily put, you can't blame God for your own fault. Though God may work together through all our decisions, even the wrong ones, into His good outcomes eventually for us as written in Romans 8:28.

Although I lived all my life as a Christian, it took awhile (many many years) for me to believe this truth.

Private school teaches creation. God created the earth.

If you want to send your kids there just because some private schools teach more biblical bases, then go for it. But I think trying to hide from exposures of this world to your kids might not be the best idea. They could go to public schools and get exposed to all those anti-biblical teachings, but I think it's more important that us parents are always open for them to ask us if they find anything questionable from their schools. We should teach and guide them what's right (and what's more biblical for Christians) regardless of what they're being taught at schools. Our responsibility is not to brain wash them nor hide them. Our responsibility is to guide them correctly and they'll choose the right path just like how God gives us His Words for us and we get to choose whether to believe or not even in the midst of this crazy world.

 

[eyephone]

It?s all personal preference. It?s up to you to reference God into the conversation regarding your wife staying at home. But it?s your choice and your interpretation.

You could of send them to private school.

I don't see it as us bringing God into our decisions or lives. We can try, but that's not how it is. It is that God is the Sovereign One and we happen to be in His perfect reign.

Yes, it was "our preference and choice" for sure. But if it was a right choice or if it was a good choice, then I believe it was God who led us to choose that path thus He takes care of us also. We can't say it was "our own wisdom." If we've chosen a wrong decision, whatever that may be, then it is all on us. God might not have anything to do with that since it was all us. Easily put, you can't blame God for your own fault. Though God may work together through all our decisions, even the wrong ones, into His good outcomes eventually for us as written in Romans 8:28.

Although I lived all my life as a Christian, it took awhile (many many years) for me to believe this truth.

Private school teaches creation. God created the earth.

If you want to send your kids there just because some private schools teach more biblical bases, then go for it. But I think trying to hide from exposures of this world to your kids might not be the best idea. They could go to public schools and get exposed to all those anti-biblical teachings, but I think it's more important that us parents are always open for them to ask us if they find anything questionable from their schools. We should teach and guide them what's right (and what's more biblical for Christians) regardless of what they're being taught at schools. Our responsibility is not to brain wash them nor hide them. Our responsibility is to guide them correctly and they'll choose the right path just like how God gives us His Words for us and we get to choose whether to believe or not even in the midst of this crazy world.

In general the curriculum is like more advance and the expectations are higher. More attention from the teacher.

 

[Mety]

It?s all personal preference. It?s up to you to reference God into the conversation regarding your wife staying at home. But it?s your choice and your interpretation.

You could of send them to private school.

I don't see it as us bringing God into our decisions or lives. We can try, but that's not how it is. It is that God is the Sovereign One and we happen to be in His perfect reign.

Yes, it was "our preference and choice" for sure. But if it was a right choice or if it was a good choice, then I believe it was God who led us to choose that path thus He takes care of us also. We can't say it was "our own wisdom." If we've chosen a wrong decision, whatever that may be, then it is all on us. God might not have anything to do with that since it was all us. Easily put, you can't blame God for your own fault. Though God may work together through all our decisions, even the wrong ones, into His good outcomes eventually for us as written in Romans 8:28.

Although I lived all my life as a Christian, it took awhile (many many years) for me to believe this truth.

Private school teaches creation. God created the earth.

If you want to send your kids there just because some private schools teach more biblical bases, then go for it. But I think trying to hide from exposures of this world to your kids might not be the best idea. They could go to public schools and get exposed to all those anti-biblical teachings, but I think it's more important that us parents are always open for them to ask us if they find anything questionable from their schools. We should teach and guide them what's right (and what's more biblical for Christians) regardless of what they're being taught at schools. Our responsibility is not to brain wash them nor hide them. Our responsibility is to guide them correctly and they'll choose the right path just like how God gives us His Words for us and we get to choose whether to believe or not even in the midst of this crazy world.

In general the curriculum is like more advance and the expectations are higher. More attention from the teacher.

Another thing I heard (not sure if it's true) is that private school students have higher chances of getting into college they want more than other public school students since there is limitations from each high school on their acceptance systems. But I assume private high schools are very expensive?

 

[Happiness]

We should teach and guide them what's right (and what's more biblical for Christians) regardless of what they're being taught at schools. Our responsibility is not to brain wash them nor hide them. Our responsibility is to guide them correctly and they'll choose the right path just like how God gives us His Words for us and we get to choose whether to believe or not even in the midst of this crazy world.

I had an older Southern Baptist friend who told me that when he was a kid back during the dust bowl, many SB parents took their kids out of school as soon as they learned to read the Bible because they believed everything their kids would need to know in life was contained therein and keeping them in school any longer risked exposure to non-Christian beliefs. My friend said the only thing that strategy accomplished was producing a lot of uneducated Southern Baptists who weren't any more Christian than their public school peers. In summary: trust your kids.

 

[Mety]

We should teach and guide them what's right (and what's more biblical for Christians) regardless of what they're being taught at schools. Our responsibility is not to brain wash them nor hide them. Our responsibility is to guide them correctly and they'll choose the right path just like how God gives us His Words for us and we get to choose whether to believe or not even in the midst of this crazy world.

I had an older Southern Baptist friend who told me that when he was a kid back during the dust bowl, many SB parents took their kids out of school as soon as they learned to read the Bible because they believed everything their kids would need to know in life was contained therein and keeping them in school any longer risked exposure to non-Christian beliefs. My friend said the only thing that strategy accomplished was producing a lot of uneducated Southern Baptists who weren't any more Christian than their public school peers. In summary: trust your kids.

While I do believe The Bible suffices the knowledge of everything we need to know, I also believe The Bible teaches for us to go out and share what's written on it. Israel failed to do so* and now the church is doing that job. I should say church is "supposed" to do that job since those SB people from your friend's story weren't really doing that job either if that story was really true. I think those parents should have learned to discipline their kids with God's Words instead of trying to brainwash them in their own wisdom. In summary: love your kids and send them out by trusting God.


*Israel will do that job again in a future according to The Bible. I just had to add this statement.

 

[irvinehomeowner]

Another thing I heard (not sure if it's true) is that private school students have higher chances of getting into college they want more than other public school students since there is limitations from each high school on their acceptance systems. But I assume private high schools are very expensive?

Someone here can answer this question better than I but I think it depends on which college and which private high school.

We found one way to mitigate the "all day with the nanny/babysitter/daycare" issue was to shift our schedules so that one of us can be with the kids during a large part of the day. This became helpful once they were in normal school as we can be home with them in the afternoon rather than having them go to CDC or some after-school program.

Also, there was a time when I was a stay-at-home dad because I was doing freelance work so I didn't need to be at an office every day. That's why I think I have a pretty good idea of the comparison between staying home with the kids vs being at work.

 

[irvinehomeowner]

Kind of back on topic here but I think most "middle class" people I know are high money earners regardless of where they live.

But, not necessarily $350k. Some make less than $100k and live in Irvine homes... but they've been there for a while.

I don't know if you were to try to buy a new home today if $100k is enough... although if you are renting and your housing expense is $2k/mo and you don't have a lot of other expenses, it's doable.