Your first step would be for both of you to take a gun safety course, widely available for a nominal charge. Then pass the 30 question test required to purchase guns and ammunition in California. You can't legally purchase out-of-state and bring into the state, either. Just check any of the gun dealers in the area. There are Turner's Outdoorsman stores located in Orange, Riverside, and Huntington Beach, for example. Several competitors, also. After that, you will be able to better judge what will suit your needs and disposition. What works for you might not work for your spouse. In my case, I grew up in the midwest with many guns in the house. Everything from replica muzzle-loading pistols and rifles to modern shotguns and modern rifles with scopes. With three hunters in the household, we generally had to have three of everything. Heck, we even had a small brass cannon -- used only to make noise on the 4th of July. It made a LOT of noise when fired.
If you have kids, or expect to have kids in the house (even occasionally) your first priority is to acknowledge that they will be curious and (mis)handle the guns if they can get to them. Lock 'em up! (Either the guns OR the kids...) When age appropriate, give the kids training so the guns in the house are not novelty items. And still keep the guns locked up while teen-age hormones rage.
California law complicates your gun selection process. For example, I have small hands and could not find a home defense pistol that was legal here and I was comfortable handling. The 12-guage shotgun that I've owned for 40 years is more than sufficient to drop anybody breaking through my door and break the door behind them. They would have to be inside before I would shoot. But the shotgun can't be stored safely in a way that makes it quickly useable. It will take some time to remove the lock. A pistol stored in a gun safe with an electronic lock would be more accessible.