Another one for Troop and some of my friends.....

tmare_IHB

tmare_IHB

New member
Wishing you the best in the next few days.





















<a href="http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lanow/2009/03/just-days-befor.html">Senate supports opposition to Prop. 8</a>
 
I am sorry I didn't see this sooner tmare...I've been neglecting the IHB.



Thank you for your thoughts....but it's not looking good. :(
 
If this doesn't turn out well, what is the next step? I guess I'm feeling a little guilty that I didn't get more involved last time. Next time around I think there are many angry heterosexuals that would be willing to become more active by both volunteering and donating. I really can't even express my anger at this point and I need someplace to put it.
 
We've already anticipated losing - and have begun gathering the 1,000,000 signatures necessary to put a PRO gay marriage proposition on the next ballot (2 years from now). So, the exact opposite of Prop 8. I'll be getting some signature sheets next week and will hit you all up at some point.



So, we wait two more years...I mean, seriously....did the other side *really* think we would give up ?



But I do think the court will allow the 18,000 marriages to stand.
 
I just talked to my son's friend's dad who was married last year and while disheartened, at least it looks like his marriage will still be recognized. He's also ready to start the fight up again and I'm hoping many more people will be willing also. Please everyone, let's pull it together to fight those who want to keep discrimination alive.
 
<object width="325" height="250"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/youtube" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="325" height="250"></embed></object>
 
<em>"Jack Reavley, left, and Bob Claunch have been together for more than half a century. For decades, it never occurred to them to want to get married. But now that they are in their 80s, the Los Angeles men are starting to regret they didn't get married when they had the chance."</em>



<a href="http://news.aol.com/article/elderly-gay-couple/373468">They met while serving their country.....</a>
 
It seems to me that there could be an older population of gay people who are not as committed to the idea of marriage equality. My friend's dad was completely uninterested in the issue saying that he didn't care one way or another. Does anyone else know of other older gay people who feel this way?
 
This from Andrew Sullivan's blog:



We discover they actually chose not to use a letter from Obama that said, among other things:



I oppose the divisive and discriminatory efforts to amend the California Constitution, and similar efforts to amend the U.S. Constitution or those of other states ... Finally, I want to congratulate all of you who have shown your love for each other by getting married these last few weeks.



Every time you feel exasperated by the uselessness of much of the gay political establishment, you realize you are not exasperated enough. (This is Sullivan's comment not mine)



http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_dish/20...
 
[quote author="Trooper" date=1236506958]



I was also surprised at the gentlemen's comment...it's almost like he isn't able to overcome his own internalized homophobia...that happens to me once in awhile. Always catches me off guard and makes me upset with myself.... basically, sometimes it's hard to "unlearn" what's been pounded into your head as a child.





I think you are absolutely right about this. It took him a marriage and two children in their teens before he finally came out. I think that there may be some acceptance of the idea that he is a second class citizen and will be that for the rest of his life. It's hard for me to imagine feeling that way but I guess after living life in the closet for 45 years, it isn't that difficult to think of yourself this way.
 
No tmare, most of the elderly couples I know jumped at the chance to get married here in CA....also in Mass and CT. That simple act prevented untold legal challenges by "close family members" upon their partners passing. They come out of the woodwork when the homo aunt/uncle/brother/sister/cousin die (see below YouTube clip from "If These Walls Could Talk 2")



I was also surprised at the gentlemen's comment...it's almost like he isn't able to overcome his own internalized homophobia...that happens to me once in awhile. Always catches me off guard and makes me upset with myself.... basically, sometimes it's hard to "unlearn" what's been pounded into your head as a child.



<object width="325" height="250"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/youtube" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="325" height="250"></embed></object>



<object width="325" height="250"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/youtube" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="325" height="250"></embed></object>
 
<object width="325" height="250"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/youtube" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="325" height="250"></embed></object>
 
In the 2nd clip, you can see Edith taking all of her partner's clothing from their room....and placing them in the 2nd bedroom....to make it look as if they did not share a bedroom.
 
<object width="325" height="250"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/youtube" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="325" height="250"></embed></object>
 
<object width="325" height="250"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/youtube" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="325" height="250"></embed></object>
 
Here's a different perspective for you to ponder: in my view, the women depicted in this story were so very, incredibly lucky...I cannot even imagine sharing my life with someone who loves me like that, and who I love back the same way. Yes, it is a travesty that they were forced to live a lie, and I'm not trying to minimize that for one moment. However the fact is that they did have each other, which is more than many people will ever have. So again I'm not trying to be disrespectful, I'm just saying that many people go through their entire lives never, ever experiencing a relationship like that. Personally, I'd rather have what they had, than go through life totally alone.
 
I hear what you are saying ISM, but I'd prefer that stranger - previously non-existent relatives, didn't come in after death and attempt to take what is not *theirs*. Unfortunately my community doesn't always protect themselves with the requisite legal protections to stop this from happening...and it happens every day. *Heartache*



Marriage would stop it in it's tracks.
 
[quote author="Trooper" date=1236506958]

I was also surprised at the gentlemen's comment...it's almost like he isn't able to overcome his own internalized homophobia...that happens to me once in awhile. Always catches me off guard and makes me upset with myself.... basically, sometimes it's hard to "unlearn" what's been pounded into your head as a child.



I think you are correct about this. It took this man one 15 year marriage and two teenage kids before he could finally admit who he was. I think much of the guilt for the pain "coming out" caused his family displays itself as "internalized homophobia" as you put it. I think it is another way of displaying his belief in the "second class citizen" label to deny that he actually deserves equal rights.
 
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