How to be Cool

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Happiness

Well-known member
Do people look at you like you walked out of the pages of ?The Good Earth??

Have you never been taught the difference between ?indoor voice? and ?outdoor voice??

Do your Americanized kids avoid acknowledging you in public?

Yes, it?s tough for an FCB to get any respect.  So let me give you a secret TI reader only tip on how you can achieve instant credibility:  get a Token Black Friend or Token Mexican Friend.

Every cool person has a TBF.  Go to any gathering and start a sentence with ?My black friend?.? and people will immediately forget that you are an FCB because, of course, FCB?s don?t have black friends.  Add to that conversation with ?on yesterday?s episode of ?This American Life? Ira Glass said ?." and that will seal the deal.

If you don?t have access to a black person, a Mexican friend will be a good 2nd choice.  Luckily for us,, we can all make friends with Qwerty, TI?s very own Token Mexican Friend.
 
I am also available by the hour for appearances, including the TI discount, its only $300/hour :-)

that is a small price to pay for street cred.
 
Happiness said:
Do people look at you like you walked out of the pages of ?The Good Earth??

Have you never been taught the difference between ?indoor voice? and ?outdoor voice??

Do your Americanized kids avoid acknowledging you in public?

Yes, it?s tough for an FCB to get any respect.  So let me give you a secret TI reader only tip on how you can achieve instant credibility:  get a Token Black Friend or Token Mexican Friend.

Every cool person has a TBF.  Go to any gathering and start a sentence with ?My black friend?.? and people will immediately forget that you are an FCB because, of course, FCB?s don?t have black friends.  Add to that conversation with ?on yesterday?s episode of ?This American Life? Ira Glass said ?." and that will seal the deal.

If you don?t have access to a black person, a Mexican friend will be a good 2nd choice.  Luckily for us,, we can all make friends with Qwerty, TI?s very own Token Mexican Friend.
Click to expand...

brah.. this isn't the age of Fresh Prince of Bel Air.. we've even passed the gay friend age..  now you have to be friends with a nerd. 
 
My mother is an old southern girl who married a Chinese man and has numerous friends and relatives of many races.  But she literally says, "...my Chinese friend X" when referring to a particular woman who she met while taking a Chinese language class.  It could be twice in the same conversation...she'll preface the name with "my Chinese friend" as if it was part of that woman's legal name.  I cringe every single time, unless we're in public, in which case I move away and act like I don't know her.
 
daedalus said:
My mother is an old southern girl who married a Chinese man and has numerous friends and relatives of many races.  But she literally says, "...my Chinese friend X" when referring to a particular woman who she met while taking a Chinese language class.  It could be twice in the same conversation...she'll preface the name with "my Chinese friend" as if it was part of that woman's legal name.  I cringe every single time, unless we're in public, in which case I move away and act like I don't know her.
Click to expand...

Actually it's cooler to say "My TI friend" nowadays.. pretty exclusive. 
 
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