Bullying Hysteria

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nosuchreality

Well-known member
Yes, I'm calling the hysteria word.

I know bullying is a real problem, particularly in our children who haven't yet formed the self confidence and skills needed to defend themselves and know they're valid.

However, when the media running wild with the story of 24 year old pro-athlete being 'bullied' by another 30 year old athlete on the team, IMHO, it's just sad.

You're going to have to deal with *ssholes in the world. You're going to have to deal with people that say bad things about you and say things you don't like.  And some of them are going to be a chronic problem.  So you better grow up and learn to shut them up, or learn to ignore them without needing to run away and cry bully.
 
It's not a hysteria IMO...you can call it bullying, harassment, hostile work environment...it's basically the same thing.  In my profession, abusive partners used to be the norm...it's not that way anymore.  Coaches hitting players and being abusive used to be okay as well, but it's not.

Also, the Martin/Incognito issue not just about dealing with a jerk.  Martin was forced to pay a significant amount of money for tabs and trips just because Incognito told him to.  The incident also resonates on the issue that being a bully/jerk makes you a "man" while refusing to go along with something you don't agree with and inform the higher ups as "weak."
 
nosuchreality said:
Yes, I'm calling the hysteria word.

I know bullying is a real problem, particularly in our children who haven't yet formed the self confidence and skills needed to defend themselves and know they're valid.

However, when the media running wild with the story of 24 year old pro-athlete being 'bullied' by another 30 year old athlete on the team, IMHO, it's just sad.

You're going to have to deal with *ssholes in the world. You're going to have to deal with people that say bad things about you and say things you don't like.  And some of them are going to be a chronic problem.  So you better grow up and learn to shut them up, or learn to ignore them without needing to run away and cry bully.
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what we face in a normal office setting is nothing vs what this guy was facing. not to mention, the incongnito has a screw loose, martin comes from a highly educated household (father/grandfather are harvard grads), is it really the prudent thing to do to try to shut up a crazy person? on caller on the radio said it best, what if he did get physical with incognito and then incognito turns out to be Aaron hernandez part 2 and shows up with a gun. Then what?

I dont have a problem with how he dealt with it. the way he dealt with it is how most parents raise their kids to deal with it (avoid violence).
 
nosuchreality said:
Yes, I'm calling the hysteria word.

I know bullying is a real problem, particularly in our children who haven't yet formed the self confidence and skills needed to defend themselves and know they're valid.

However, when the media running wild with the story of 24 year old pro-athlete being 'bullied' by another 30 year old athlete on the team, IMHO, it's just sad.

You're going to have to deal with *ssholes in the world. You're going to have to deal with people that say bad things about you and say things you don't like.  And some of them are going to be a chronic problem.  So you better grow up and learn to shut them up, or learn to ignore them without needing to run away and cry bully.
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this sounds like his fellow colleagues blaming martin because he allowed to happen.
 
nosuchreality said:
There's a lot of hyperbole flying around, if some of it is true than Incognito is way other the line.
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hyperbole? have you read the transcript of the text martin received?

here it is:  "Hey, wassup, you half n----- piece of s---. I saw you on Twitter, you been training 10 weeks. [I want to] s--- in your f---ing mouth. [I'm going to] slap your f---ing mouth. [I'm going to] slap your real mother across the face [laughter]. F--- you, you're still a rookie. I'll kill you."

does that sound like hyperbole?
 
qwerty said:
nosuchreality said:
There's a lot of hyperbole flying around, if some of it is true than Incognito is way other the line.
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hyperbole? have you read the transcript of the text martin received?

here it is:  "Hey, wassup, you half n----- piece of s---. I saw you on Twitter, you been training 10 weeks. [I want to] s--- in your f---ing mouth. [I'm going to] slap your f---ing mouth. [I'm going to] slap your real mother across the face [laughter]. F--- you, you're still a rookie. I'll kill you."

does that sound like hyperbole?
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I haven't seen a transcript, I've seen lots of reports with everything saying text allegedly says. That's what I mean by hyperbole.  I haven't seen or heard a lot of confirmed facts, I'm seeing and hearing a lot of 'allegedly'  What you're posting is clearly over the line and that's not bullying if that's the case, that's psycho-path.

 
nosuchreality said:
qwerty said:
nosuchreality said:
There's a lot of hyperbole flying around, if some of it is true than Incognito is way other the line.
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hyperbole? have you read the transcript of the text martin received?

here it is:  "Hey, wassup, you half n----- piece of s---. I saw you on Twitter, you been training 10 weeks. [I want to] s--- in your f---ing mouth. [I'm going to] slap your f---ing mouth. [I'm going to] slap your real mother across the face [laughter]. F--- you, you're still a rookie. I'll kill you."

does that sound like hyperbole?
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I haven't seen a transcript, I've seen lots of reports with everything saying text allegedly says. That's what I mean by hyperbole.  I haven't seen or heard a lot of confirmed facts, I'm seeing and hearing a lot of 'allegedly'  What you're posting is clearly over the line and that's not bullying if that's the case, that's psycho-path.
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the guy has had issues from a young kid - had issues at nebraska and oregon. his former coach currently with the St Louis said that it was about time that this guy got kicked out of the NFL for all of his antics.
 
Does the age really matter?

Bullying is bullying. In some "workplaces" it's part of the culture and if an individual can't take it, they should remove themselves. Does it make the actions of those right or wrong? That's subjective.

Put it this way... it can be classified as harassment. And if this was from a male to a female, I don't think people would be siding with the male.
 
irvinehomeowner said:
Does the age really matter?

Bullying is bullying. In some "workplaces" it's part of the culture and if an individual can't take it, they should remove themselves. Does it make the actions of those right or wrong? That's subjective.

Put it this way... it can be classified as harassment. And if this was from a male to a female, I don't think people would be siding with the male.
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Yes I do think age matters.  As does the situation.  More importantly, I think we need to keep in mind that the claims are predominantly, if not solely coming from the lawyer who is positioning his multi-million dollar case for a high draft pick that is in the process of washing out.

None of that makes it right, if the harassment was real and intended and not just athlete smack talk. 

Pro football isn't a big 4 accounting firm or law office.  It's not really a typical work environment at all.  An the line on a football team is a very different place.  To succeed on the line, you have to enjoy knocking people down.  ENJOY.  You attitude needs to be, I'm going to knock your *ss down, and IF you TRY to get up, I'm going to knock your *ss back down before you get up.  Then I'm going to do it AGAIN, and AGAIN, and AGAIN, until you go cry to your momma.  While it is a 'job' is also more FRAT than job and that may not be right either, but it's not like any office job.

It's not about being a man, it's about the job.  It's about the team, because the line is only as good as the guy who's foot is next to yours.

Would it be acceptable from a man to woman?  It's not ever going to be a man to a woman on the football field, that is part of the point.  It's nothing like the should women be in combat.  A reasonable woman standard has no place in the discussion. It's a discussion about what's reasonable  in an elite male competitive sport environment.  Interactions between men should not be measure by what's appropriate for interactions between a man and woman.

And again, I'll reiterate, if that's being said is true, it's over the top and inappropriate and is far beyond hazing and rights of passage.
 
The type of job in the workplace should not determine the way you treat someone *outside* of the work place.

That's seems immaterial to me here, regardless of the job. Ex-players, radio hosts etc have said that they "agree" with this type of behavior during practice, in the locker room etc... but it gets fuzzy when it's not on the field or at the "workplace".

I can see blame on both sides... but the overall questioning of "bullying hysteria" should not be a matter of age, workplace, etc... if one party feels bullied, that's their right to do so and take action to stop it. Whether the real motivation isn't due to the harassment but more to poor job performance is another issue, but in regards to "bullying", the only way to stop it is to stand up to it, or else you just perpetuate it.

P.S. The job of O-line isn't to "knock people down". It's to protect your quarterback and the routes of your running backs, you can do that effectively without having to knock anyone down. Just sayin'.
 
Yes, I agree on the stand up and not perpetuate it.  And out of workplace is again a different thing, but there too, a group of guys that hang together, play b-ball on the nights weekends are going to have some varied degrees of smack talk outside of the court.  NFL football isn't a 9-5 job.  It's not a group friends playing ball after work either, it's somewhere in between.

And I disagree, the O-line is to knock people down, shove them out of the way and protect your teammates and clear the path. They are not clearing path by singing kumbaya with the other players.  It's a very physical place. The D is doing everything they can to go around you, over you, or through you and best way for them not to is by being on their *ss.

I'm a cynic, cause I know lawyers, if the lawyer can hype it up enough before filing, he can settle a large claim without the fight to make it go away. 
 
nosuchreality said:
Yes, I agree on the stand up and not perpetuate it.  And out of workplace is again a different thing, but there too, a group of guys that hang together, play b-ball on the nights weekends are going to have some varied degrees of smack talk outside of the court.  NFL football isn't a 9-5 job.  It's not a group friends playing ball after work either, it's somewhere in between.

And I disagree, the O-line is to knock people down, shove them out of the way and protect your teammates and clear the path. They are not clearing path by singing kumbaya with the other players.  It's a very physical place. The D is doing everything they can to go around you, over you, or through you and best way for them not to is by being on their *ss.

I'm a cynic, cause I know lawyers, if the lawyer can hype it up enough before filing, he can settle a large claim without the fight to make it go away.
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Being physical has absolutely nothing to do with it. 
 
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