My son got hurt at Quail Hill Community Center class!

Yuchiy2

New member
I received a call from the teacher of the Reading Readiness class my son is currently attending at the new Quail Hill community center. (It's suppose to be a very popular class.) The teacher said he got a cut on his eye and they didn't know what happened. She said it could be a paper cut or something. When I saw it I was so shocked because it was way more than a paper cut. My son said that a boy in his class hit him with a car and pushed him down. He also said he was making fun of him verbally. I am thankful that this wasn't his eyeball; he could have lost his vision. When I was talking to the teachers they didn't seem concerned and didn't even offer to call the other kid's parent.
Eventually after we requested the teacher said she would contact the parents.
I received a phone call and all she said was that the other parents were sorry this happened to my son and we can talk on Friday.
The teacher also seemed to be one sided saying the other boy never had this kind of problem and my son didn't cry or say anything and that other children usually tell what's going on to the teachers.

No one is taking this seriously.

What would you do?
 

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I am sorry to read this about your son. The teacher should have been concerned and taken the right steps, the teachers reaction and handling just doesn't seem right to me.

Can you take this up with the school principal? I feel bringing it up to the principal will get the right attention
for what happened with your son .  You can also raise your concerns with how the teacher handled it when speaking to the principal ; I don't agree with with teacher that just because your son is quite that this happened to him..Its teachers job to be aware of the children's behaviour in class.

I would really suggest discussing with the school principal.
 
Thumbs down for triple post?.  please stop spamming us.

Edit: my bad you posted four times! So you created an account today on a message board you've never participated in and are spamming us.
 
I think the parent is corcerned and wants to get some  inputs. I don't see it as a spam. The parent is hoping to get a response and may be unsure which one is the right forum category.

 
Right, there's no principal.
My husband talked to the supervisor or something and she was very unconcerned as well. She told us we need to just talk to the teacher because it's basically not her problem at this point.
 
This place sounds terrible. Their lack of concern is a red flag. Why don't they have a Yelp listing? That's probably why they don't seem to care. No accountability. I say screw them, get your son out, and get your money back.

 
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Try contacting Laurie Hoffman and work you're way down from the top.  Maybe a visit to the civic center is needed. 
 
Someguy, checking in here.

I'm sorry to see that your son was hurt.  It seems only natural to want to protect your child from harm.  I'm not going to try to tell you what to do, you're the parent, but will try to imagine what I would do if I were in your position.


I guess first is to figure out what I want to get out of this situation.  Do I want to shame the other child and parent in front of my child?  Do I want to get the teachers fired and show my child I'll do 10x the damage to anyone who hurts him?  Do I want to get the city involved so that the incident is made public forever?  Is any of that going to help my child in the long run?

Look, boys can play rough sometimes.  It must hurt a parent to see their child in pain.  Sometimes people cross the line and are mean and even violent. 

Eye lids bleed extremely rapidly.  I bet if that cut was cleaned up it would look much better.

I think I would want to turn the situation into a learning opportunity for my son.  I'd sit down and talk with him about it.  "Tell me how that happened?"  "What do you think the other child should have done instead of hurting you?" "Is there anything you might have done to provoke the other child?"  "What could you have done differently?"  "What do you think is a fair consequence to the other child?"  "Would you be willing to forgive the other child if he apologized?"  "Gosh it sure hurts when people are violent huh?  You wouldn't want to hurt people like that would you?"  "If someone else shows signs of being violent towards you in the future, what do think you should do?"  "The teacher said you didn't tell her when you were hurt and bleeding.  If you ever feel threatened or hurt, it's important to get the teacher involved right away, okay?"

And for the Friday meeting, I would want everyone in attendance to feel safe/comfortable/respected so every can speak openly about the situation.  The children will observe how the adults handle it.  The other parents are probably already ashamed and embarrassed.  I know I would be if my son hurt another kid.  I'd try to encourage the children to talk about and resolve the issue.  Try to get them to agree on a resolution.  Parents/teachers can obviously guide them and step in as needed.

I think making a huge deal about this would embarrass my son.  He's going to encounter accidents in the future.  He's going to encounter mean people in the future.  I can't be there to fix it for him every time, I need to teach him how to handle those situations so he can resolve them on his own.

Anyway, that's coming from some random internet stranger.  What do I know?  Again, sorry to hear that your son was hurt at his reading class.  I hope you find the resolution you're looking for.
 
Thanks Someguy.
I'm not trying to get anyone in trouble but the way they handled it was not acceptable and professional at all.
This is a city run institution and I expected more from them... especially in Irvine, a city that's suppose to be super friendly for kids and families.
I know kids especially boys are rough sometimes but that doesn't help the problem at all...
What if he got hurt even more? Or some kid get hurt again?
There are about 20 kids in the class and two teachers. The teacher said this all happened within like 2 minutes that they were transitioning from paper work to the next activity.
Anyway, I just hope the other parents teach their kid the right way and I also taught my kids what to do if this kind of thing happens again (or course I did in the past too but kids sometimes get shocked at the moment and don't know what to do....).
And of course hope the teachers and the institution get their act together.....
 
Oh and by the way, the teacher told me that the teachers can't be in the middle or facilitate our meeting on Friday. Only the parents can talk it out.... which is bull if you ask me....
 
Back when I was in Kindergarten in Taiwan, I was the new kid (we just moved) and the play yard had this big rotating globe thing that the kids can climb into and other kids can spin it.  It was made of metal rods and looked somewhat like this, but bigger with 2 entrance areas:

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I was told by the other kids to stand by one of the entrance areas while they spin the globe and the metal rod smacked me on the forehead.  They all laughed as I was knocked down with head bleed and ran way when the teacher came running.  My parents ended up sending me to a Catholic school with better discipline, and to this day I still have a faint scar on my forehead.

It was a good lesson to learn that many people will enjoy hurting you.  As much as it pains you as a parent to see your son hurt, some lessons in life are terrible and taught the hard way.  He must learn and find ways to defend & protect himself.  We can send bullies to detention in school, but in the adult world there is no detention for fair-weathered friends/lovers and coworkers who'd throw you under the bus.
 
Thanks for your story Momopi.
Yeah I know what you mean.... I won't be here forever to help him out... I will pull him out of the class. It's disappointing because I thought it was a good class....
Praying that all our children will meet only good students and good teachers.
Thank you everyone for your input.

 
Sorry that this happened to your son. I don't have any experience in dealing with this, but have read some good resources online.
http://www.stompoutbullying.org/ind...do-if-your-child-being-bullied-and-resources/

Interestingly it says on the top of the page: "Never approach the bully?s parents, as this is a job for either the school, or the police (if outside of school)."

IPD has a youth services unit. They were in several high schools last month giving talks about bullying, teen safety etc. I'd give them a call and ask for advice.
http://www.cityofirvine.org/ipd-divisions-bureaus-units/school-resource-officers

I'd also contact the city as it is a city approved community class through the Rec department.
 
If you like the reading class, don't pull your son out.

Just work with the teachers... it's weird that they (the teachers) don't want to get involved, it's their program.
 
This doesn't seem like bullying. Sounds more like a frustration/aggression issue with kids/toddlers. I know that they will kick out aggressive kids from more organized city programs (for example, iPAC).

 
I can't work with teachers like this.... she said my son didn't cry or say anything... and also the other kids usually say like so and so is bothering someone if this kind of thing happens. Basically she doesn't trust my son.....

She doesn't want to get in trouble that's probably why she is blaming the victim.... sad....
 
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